this one is a no-brainer.

achy breaky heart by billy ray cyrus.

don’t break my heart, my achy breaky heart.  oh but billy, you did. 

maybe it was the mullet.  maybe it was your tight blue jeans.  maybe it was your checkered shirt with its ripped sleeves.  maybe it was because ‘if i told your heart it would blow up and kill this man’ (a little dramatic don’t you think?). 

ok, so it wasn’t the mullet – you eventually upgraded to a flat-iron.  and it definitely wasn’t your style – this small town girl loves a guy in skinny denim and plaid (full-length sleeve though please).  which only leaves us with the music and the lyrics.  to be blunt – they suck.  yes, i told the world that i never was your girl; we even laughed about you on the phone.  i told your fingertips to get away from my lips, in fact don’t even reach out to me at all.  i never told my ma that you moved to arkansas…and aunt louise, well don’t even get me started on her.  and i agree, yourself already knew that you are not okay because your mind, well it walked out on you well before the day you decided to pen this song. 

so billy, i am sorry, but i am telling your heart – your achy breaky heart – that i hate your song.  because of it i stopped listening to county music (perhaps that was a good thing).  but hey, maybe miley can restore my faith one day.  in fact, tell her to call me – we can party with our hands up in the u s of a.

other honourable mentions:

CBC Radio 2 takes a jab: http://www.cbc.ca/radio2/index.html

Total Guitar/Music Radar’s blog forum on worst songs ever: http://www.musicradar.com/search?searchTerm=worst+songs