maybe it has been the music. maybe it has been the people i have met. maybe it has been my fascination with beat poets. maybe it all started when i picked up a pen again….or maybe it is just because it has been long enough.
whatever the ‘if, maybe, perhaps or i suppose’ is…something is changing. something is shifting. purely internal, entirely positive this blissful, internal peace of mine is blooming – just like any part of nature that is facing a new beginning; the turn of a season. with it comes a sense of rejuvenation, harmless innocence to start again, the absolute assurance that yes, the risk, the disparity, the loneliness, the failure has succumbed. i took flight and inevitably faltered. but i also had to have this perplexed willingness to stumble in order to truly soar.
life – it is shifting. and it was only mere weeks ago that i took pride refuge in the unknown…the lingering distance. the space between. neither here nor there, i didn’t really care. until i heard a man speak about his war-torn experience in a lost, broken land and how he turned that into generous philanthropy…until i lived like a rockstar on the edge of a cliff with a confidant that reminded me what it is to be real…until i indulged in patti smith’s honest tribute to the controversial 1960-70s era…did i really get it.
yes, this all happened in the span of a week, which is a long period of time when one has been as curious and flippant as i. but, as many have quoted the great guitar poet before, “the times, they are a changin’.”
and with this sweep of change i can finally see a beautiful direction. after 29 years it looks like i may be finding my way.
bring on the illustrious, winding, narrow road ahead.